PAGE 10 HIGH GEAR

structures

Mark Kinsley and Louise Taylor

(Cont'd from page 9)

and then she would roll over to face the wall and doze off while I lay in thought. Sometimes, though, we would have a long weekend to face the wall and

doze off while I listened to the

middle she would cry out in real pain and release and the tears would come and with them the Kathy I loved and then with her curled in my arms we would drift off to sleep together, but those times were rare.

In the end things were worse. We spoke very little and our rainfall outside the window. duties seemed to separate us and Sometimes, though, we would keep us away from each other in have a long weekend off together different parts of the town or the and by Sunday night, she was house and finally we drifted into warm and flirtatious and the isolation of living together brushing up against me need-alone. The laughter she had once lessly and yet shy all at once and brought to her work with her

we would make love and in the

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children had long since departed and I had no replacement for it of my own and the days drifted on without pattern or flow as I watched Kathy pull her borders in farther and farther. Valium was the rule of the day and I was often afraid as I watched the hard little white pills make their journey from her soft pink hand to her mouth and if she was often extraquiet or drowsy at least she was no longer jumpy or hyper anymore. There had been a time when we would have stayed up all night and talked these things through and raised ourselves up together but that was over and long gone. We were headed in different directions entirely and our concerns were diverging quickly and cleanly toward a

break

When it finally came it was late autumn and the leaves fell and

clustered then finally blew away. Kathy kept her job; she is still there teaching and the children who are a little older still say the same things about her to each other and wonder what the words mean that they have learned from their parents. I don't know if she still lives in the same house although I suspect she does. I moved into a women's collective in mid-November and by the time there were patches of wet white snow on the ground there were five of us all living together in the same run-down house with ancient and sweet-smelling pinewood panels still rimming the arches and doorways and cracks that leaked cold winter wind on long evenings. We are a small community and we are not always tolerant or raised in consciousness but our growing sharing is at least giving me a small and budding sense of selfaffirmation. It is fragile but growing and I nurture it when I can I still sit under trees in the rain and watch the seasons pass and wonder about willow trees. Sometimes I think that plaster patches cannot cover up what is too deep inside; sometimes I think that vines planted by others can make you strong or weak and that is up to you. Sometimes I cry about what has happened to Kathy and me and to people like us, and sometimes now at least! have company.

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This "spring theme" arrangement was created for HIGH GEAR by Mark Kinsley, a student of Mrs. Louise H Taylor (Cleveland), a floral artist

by profession, and an accredited instructor of the Ichiyo and Ike bana schools of floral art

"Pick your spotwe'll get you there!"

Groups are welcome